Puck Pact: Chapter 2
I ease open the front door and creep inside my house, making sure to close it quietly behind me before gently laying my keys on the entryway table so they don’t make too much noise.
But it’s no use.
The jingling of metal followed by the pitter-patter of feet echo in the hall.
“Daddy!”
I flip on the lights just in time to see a flash of unruly dark curls as it crashes into my leg, followed by our dog, Ellie, jumping up to plant her front paws on my ribs.
“Daddy, you’re home. I waited up for you.”
“Even though I told her not to.” Annie, my nanny, leans against the wall and shakes her head as she gives me an apologetic smile.
I chuckle as I push Ellie down so I can hoist Giuliana into my arms. “That’s okay. I’m in the mood for some bedtime snuggles anyway.”
Giuliana wraps her arms and legs around me like a koala, laying her head on my shoulder. I close my eyes, relishing in her love and letting her warmth soothe my troubled heart.
“Can we lay in the big bed together?” she asks.
“Sure. Why don’t you take Ellie into my room and get it ready for me so I can say goodnight to Annie and lock up the house.”
Giuliana squeals, not in the least bit tired as she springs from my arms. “Bye, Annie! Come on, Ellie. I told you Daddy would let us snuggle in his bed.”
I shake my head as they run into the hallway, thick as thieves. “She doesn’t want to snuggle. She’s only using me for my bed.”
Annie grins. “She’s a master manipulator, and she’s only three.”
“I’m terrified to see how smart she’ll be when she’s a teenager.” I chuckle. “How was everything tonight?”
“Fine, as always.”
Annie is a longtime family friend who I kept in touch with after my parents passed. When she found out about Giuliana three years ago, she jumped at the chance to help me. I was an unexpected parent, and became an unexpected single parent when Giuliana’s mom relinquished her rights. Annie was there for me when I had no one, and she has become an important part of our family. Sometimes, I think my mother sent her to me because she couldn’t be here herself.
Annie slides on her coat, but before she opens the front door, she turns around to face me. “You know you’re allowed to have a personal life, Alexander.” She lowers her voice as she glances toward the hallway. “Being a father doesn’t mean you’re not allowed to do things for yourself every once in a while.”
Heat creeps into my cheeks, as if she can see the evidence of Aarya all over me. “I just want to be here for Giuliana. That’s my priority.”
“As she should be. But your happiness is a priority too. Don’t let yourself feel guilty about it. Your parents would tell you the same if they were here.”
I pull her in for a much-needed hug. “Thank you, Annie.”
“I just want to see you happy.” She presses her palm to my cheek. “That’s all.”
I nod. “I know.”
I watch her until she’s safely inside the guest house in our yard, and then I make my way into my bedroom to see my favorite girl.
Giuliana is sprawled out in the middle of my bed with Ellie beside her—head on a pillow like the human she thinks she is. I pause in the doorway, my chest expanding as my heart swells at the sight.
“How was hockey, Daddy?” Giuliana rubs a silky piece of fabric on her blanket. “Did you play good?”
“I did.” I flop onto the mattress beside her, brushing her curls away from her face. “How was your night? Did you take good care of Ellie while I was gone?”
“Uh-huh. Annie let me hold her leash when we went on a walk.” She scrunches her nose. “But then she took a really big poop and we needed to go back to the house to get another bag because it was a two-fer.”
I tilt my head back as I laugh. “Two-fer? Is that what Annie said?”
“Yup. It was disgusting.”
“Sounds like it.” I twirl one of her curls around my index finger. “Did you wash good in the bath tonight?”
Giuliana rolls her eyes. “Of course, Daddy. I’m a big girl now. I know how to wash myself.”
“Oh, excuse me. I’m so sorry. I forget how big you are sometimes because you look so tiny in my big bed. Maybe if you slept in your own kid-sized bed, I’d be able to remember.”
Her bottom lip juts out. “But yours is so much better than mine.”
“Our mattresses are exactly the same, except mine is bigger because I’m bigger.”
She snuggles closer to me, nuzzling her head against my chest. “I just don’t want you to be lonely in this big bed all by yourself.”
“Lonely?” I pull back and glance down at her sweet face. “Where did you hear that word?”
“At school.”
“What do you think it means?”
“It’s when you don’t have anybody to sleep in your bed with.” Big round eyes blink up at me. “Makayla’s mom sleeps in bed with her dad. Robby said his mom sleeps in bed with his dad. Stella has two moms and no dad, but her two moms sleep in the same bed together.”
Ah, I see where this is going.
“Even I have someone to sleep in bed with.” Giuliana reaches behind her and runs her fingers through Ellie’s fur. “You’re the only one who sleeps alone, and that means you’re lonely.”
I press a kiss to the top of her head. “Just because I sleep alone doesn’t mean I’m lonely, angel girl. Lots of people only have one mom, or one dad. Some people don’t have a mom or a dad, and one of their other family members raises them. Everyone’s family looks different.”
“So, you’re not lonely then?”
My chest squeezes at her question. “No, baby. How could I be when I have you?”
“I’m not gonna be around forever, you know. I’m gonna go to college one day. And you can’t come with me. Parents aren’t allowed at college.”
I chuckle as I pull her close and wrap my arms around her. “That’s a long time away, so let’s not think about that just yet.”
“I’m just keepin’ it real, Dad.”
My eyebrows shoot up. “Keeping it real?”
“Uncle Mac taught me that one.”
“Of course, he did.”
McKinley is the only one of my teammates who knows about my daughter. He was there the day Giuliana’s mother showed up at my door with a positive pregnancy test, and he has kept the secret ever since. It’s not that I want to hide Giuliana from my friends, or that I’m embarrassed of her, or even that I don’t trust them. But Giuliana is my whole world—the only thing that truly matters to me. I’ve been trying to shield her from the spotlight I’m forced to be in. She didn’t ask for this lifestyle, and I intend on keeping her out of it for as long as I can.
Which is why I don’t allow myself to be photographed with women, or indulge in one-night stands like some of my other teammates. I can’t risk not being here when Giuliana needs me because I’m too busy getting my dick wet somewhere in the city. It’s bad enough that hockey takes me away from her as much as it does, but at least I can rationalize that it’s my means to support her, not some extracurricular choice.
I roll off the side of the bed and kick off my shoes. “I’m going to wash up for bed, and then it’s time for you to go to sleep.”
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I smirk at the sight of her pouty face. “Yes, in the big bed.”
She grins as she burrows under the covers.
After I brush my teeth and change into my pajamas, I slip into bed and watch Giuliana sleep for a while. It calms me, watching the rise and fall of her chest as she breathes in and out through her tiny parted lips.
The truth is: I am lonely. Being a single parent is isolating enough. Add in the schedule of a professional athlete, and it’s doubly as hard to have a personal life and make a true connection with someone.
My loneliness is the only reason I can think of as to why I almost gave in to Aarya tonight.
God, what I would’ve given to be able to succumb to her for just one night. She’s gorgeous, and feisty as hell. The attraction was there. Those lush lips and her sinful curves, accentuated by that barely-there dress she wore. How easy it would’ve been to say yes and indulge myself. To lose my sense and forget about my responsibilities, forget who I’m supposed to be, forget about what’s right and wrong.
But I don’t have the luxury of acting on my desires. Not anymore. Not even for one night.
Plus, Aarya made it clear she wants nothing to do with a serious relationship, and that isn’t the type of woman I need to be entertaining. I don’t want to be another notch on someone’s belt; an accomplishment to boast about; some shiny object people want to show off.
I haven’t gotten laid in an embarrassingly long time. My teammates would think I was crazy if they knew just how long. And it’s not for lack of options. I’m a twenty-nine-year-old professional athlete with willing women literally throwing themselves at me wherever I go.
But I want more. I want to find love. A relationship. Someone I can turn to when life gets hard. Someone I can care for.
I want what my parents had.
And I want that for Giuliana too.
I have to hold out until I find it.
My mind whirls into the late hours of the night, and when sleep finally comes, I dream about Giuliana skipping through the waves on the beach in Tuscany with a mother who loves her.